prologuing it

WHEREIN an accidental editing faux pas at a major alt-weekly has resulted in a description of Anthony Hamilton, under my byline, as
“MMM… complete man.”
I didn’t write it, but I was thinking it.
WHEREIN I have shed that unclean Jim Jones feeling (retarded, aggro, can’t get signed to the Roc) and have taken up an entirely more serene celebrity state-of-being: The Incredible Lightness of Britney.
WHEREIN the most pleasurable function of my employment, by far, demands I download back-catalogue, like Splack Pack & Kidd Money’s Big Booty Hits (lemme hear you say scrrruuub da ground!), Satoko Fujii Quartet’s Minerva (my entire piano-playing existence has been a feeble attempt to copy Satoko Fujii’s whirlybird tone blocks and trigonometrical rhythms), and Various Artists: A Tribute to the Cure: 1000 Tears (Cleopatra Records), which I actually purchased on CD when it came out, and from which Kill Switch Klick, Electric Hellfire Club, Bell Book & Candle, Wreckage or any number of its contributors would today be signed to a low five-figure deal with Astralwerks, or at least have been put on the bill with ARE Weapons and Bloc Party (who are binoculars*–but as Crunkcchanalia put it, “wrong band wrong place wrong time”).
* bazonkers + ridonculous = “binoculars.” Catchdubs, watch out; I’m right behind thee!

This entry was posted in Opinion. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to prologuing it

  1. binoculars is going to be the shit that i saw for two weeks until my friends tell me ‘shut the fuck up with the binoculars, rollie.’ i can’t fucking wait.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>