– Research, archives, books, papers, microfilms, awkward sweaty interactions with nice helpful people
– métro all over the place, very hot, get home so fast no matter where you are
– mean pretty girls are the same no matter where you go
– too much bread
– so sick of bread
– “vegan soldier wants to know if you’re going to eat your bread”
– old man at Godard’s latest film with French friend probably having great time; I stayed home due to menstruation issues
– rode train to Versailles (the town) where other French friends live; didn’t go to Versailles (the castle) due to friends not wanting to; kind of bummed but maybe will go on thursday
– had birthday (33)
– figured out (partially) another archive; this one very fancy, you have to leave all your stuff in a locker and can only bring pencil (not pen) inside! Made fool of myself but now know the drill; apparently they are holding a box of stuff for me to see tomorrow. What if it proves/disproves my entire dissertation? “Dear Diary, I am gay, sincerely, Ludwig van Beethoven, p.s. not a joke”
– hung out with cat who spends all his time raping small stuffed lion
– had awesome petit déjeuner sans oeuf this morning that came with a smoothie, which the waitress called a “smoosie.” This enabled us to realize that French doesn’t have the “th” sound like we do–all their “th” words are said like a regular “t.” Forevermore I will drink only smoosies.
– have pictures to post but weird French internet isn’t letting me.
– have reached that point in a month-long sojourn in another country where you long for home in the most minute details. I miss the rug underneath my desk! I miss using a phone! I miss my shorts I forgot to pack! I miss coffee with water in it! I miss jogging so much!
– This trip might finally be teaching me to drink black coffee, which is really weird for me
– my speaking skills are not getting much better but my hearing skills are
– the film “Step Up 3” is here called “Sexy Dance 3,” and the Woody Allen film “Sleeper” is called “Woody and the Robots.”
– Edward Scissorhands is called “Edward with the hands of silver.”
I long for autumn! I am so excited for cold weather. I am so much more geared toward the cold seasons than the warm. After 2 months of summer I am heartily sick of it but it takes me much longer than that of autumn/winter before I get sick of it. Today I ordered a thick crocheted orange and gray neckwarmer thing off etsy. I like to think of it waiting for me at home. I will wear it in the crisp autumn days on my way to the coffee shop and I will remember my awesome sweaty exciting adventure in Paris and I will marvel at the passage of time.
We might get a dog.
33 years old! Every year you get older, you can’t believe it, at least I can’t. On the one hand I still feel just the same as always, but on the other hand if I interrogate the word “always” I see immediately that it isn’t true. I no longer have anything in common with myself at 8 years old, and in fact can barely even put myself in her shoes. I “feel” nothing like her. What do we mean when we say we feel the same as always? Do we just mean our brain is still our brain, and not the brain of some random old person who has no subjectivity?
I’m the age Jesus was when he died, right? Seems like that guy accomplished a lot by this age. I don’t think I can really compete.
– can finally do “crow”
– finally learned to spell “bureacracy.” SHIT
– can type 117 words per minute
– stopped biting nails (mostly)
– once ran a mile in 5 minutes and 53 seconds
– won 3rd grade spelling bee (“Antarctica”)
– never became a smoker
– got an MA from an accredited university
– learned how to bake bread
– finally started worm bin
– ensnared husband
– can tie cherry stem in knot with just my tongue
– can do passable impression of Forrest Gump
– know one card trick
– have never been punched in the face
– once watched all of Twin Peaks season 1 in one sitting