In 2015 I ignored all my friends and family and I'm going to not do that this year (maybe I'll do it in 2017).
And somewhat counter-intuitively I'm going to be more selfish/proactive about how I want to spend my time.
I'm going to be a more active participant in my relationship.
At work I'm going to fight less for my own vision and embrace the collective vision of what we're working on.
I also have been working on a KmikeyM Year in Review and Plan for 2016 but it's a daunting task and I keep putting it off. So I should also resolve to attack my procrastination.
I want to read more. Which is as easy as just reading fiction.
I want to find a mentor, without really understanding what kind of relationship that is.
I want to accomplish more creative projects but focus less on whimsy and pure "fun" and more on projects that will benefit people (possibly financially).
I want to get my personal finances in order. It's never been a thing I worried about. I want to worry a little bit about it.
I want to host more intentional gatherings. I like a dinner party or whatever, but I miss Chip Party, NachOlympics, etc.
Comments
Get a job
Find a place to live with my old man
Start cooking real meals again
Start exercising
Catch up on sleep (basically repair all the physical damage of grad school)
Read books that aren't theory or art history
Start brushing my cats teeth
Re-design my website
Give more/better attention to my friends
have some damn fun
I resolve to:
publish another article
keep exercising
take a chance professionally (new school? administration? maybe!)
cook more dinners
learn to bake a few go-to treats
take on a fun creative project
stay up later sometimes
perform a stand up set
have fun with my friends
stay in love
2. Continue trying to find balance re: hating my creative projects vs permitting myself to fail.
3. Not take the above so seriously.
4. Hang out with friends more often.
- Finish the cabin
- Get huge muscles
- Fuck up a fascist
loving and seeing myself and others better
dressing weirder
write a business plan
paint a cloud
KEEP
reading daily
playing piano daily
exercising
STOP
drinking too much
working too much at something I don't love
Buy a car
Train to dunk a basketball (hold over resolution since 2013)
So, I might not be practicing perfectly, but I kind of think I am, since there isn't much to it.
Mine:
- publish something
- get a book proposal together so I can go see a writing coach
- get a weirder hairstyle
- continue working on being less selfish and seeing other people more clearly and sympathetically (a lifelong project I will never fully achieve but one must always struggle)
- start exercising again (?? seems impossible)
- drink just a little bit less, I'm not made of stone
- bring more calm and acceptance to struggles in my life I have no real control over (night sweats, hip dysplasia)
- clean the house once a week
- get on a good bread-baking schedule; stop buying bread
- plan out a garden and native-plant-based bee-friendly landscaping scheme for spring and then actually stick to the plan
- start calling my mother in law sometimes just to say hi
- observe all of my TAs in the classroom at least once a semester instead of constantly putting it off
- develop a more grownup and confident professional persona. Edit my shit instead of sheepishly sending it out knowing it's not good yet. Own that I am a qualified professional and my opinions and ideas are valid. Stop acting like an abject grad student and deferring to everyone and being afraid to ask a question in a conference Q&A or whatever. Stop being self-deprecating in my interactions with senior scholars. Stop accidentally cussing in class. Own my ideas and their validity. Just be a goddamn grown-ass professional woman
- become a bit more of a hardass w/r/t grading
- figure out an appropriate balance, in dealing with students, between being a compassionate human being and taking on too much affective labor because I am a woman and people unconsciously take advantage of women in this way and I don't have time to be a therapist to all 200 of my students when my male colleagues don't have to deal with this issue at all and are getting to spend hours and hours working on their tenure files while I am listening to 8,000 kids tell me about their daddy issues because I am "nice" and "non-threatening."
- be a bit more threatening
- buy a keyboard and develop a piano practice
- work more earnestly on French (see a tutor)
- continue developing the nascent friendships I am working on in my new milieu
- do the sun lamp every day no matter what
- get my teeth whitened
- get better at tarot cards
- start using the expensive night cream my mother insisted on buying me
- spend MANY HOURS every week close-listening to 18th- and 19th-century music (INCLUDING OPERA, don't wuss out) while following in a score
- buy shitloads of scores using startup funds
- learn some of the basics of music theory that I never actually learned and now have to constantly pretend I understand
I wonder how many of these I will actually do
Tarot: my friend recommended this course: http://tarotcourse.littleredtarot.com/
you want to be there for your students, who you love, and some of whom are legit struggling with serious shit, but
(a) you truly AREN'T trained in dealing with such serious shit
(b) even though it's not the students' fault, due to it being totally unconscious, but it truly IS infuriating that your male colleagues are almost literally NEVER confronted with this dilemma, simply because of how society works
(c) you truly DO want to know when they think they can get their annotated bibliography done
- emailing basically-suicidal students about their annotated bibliographies
- filling out the paperwork to get my classroom keys
- going to committee meetings and angrily yelling "GREAT LETS VOTE" every two seconds
- worrying I don't have enough blazers
http://k5m.today/2015-in-review/
http://www.shamanscave.com/practices/mirror-scrying
Would also get high and burn a bible. Lemme know!
Starting 2016 with an extra challenge \:D/
I want to restart it.
Also I want people to write to my advice blog.
Also Sarah I forgot to respond to your text I just realized!!! But I'm sorry about your little limb!!!
I've already kept one resolution and broken another
Am starting to feel dread r.e. 2016.
Neither of these things was THAT BAD, I'm still healthy, loved, privileged, so nbd. Hopefully it stops here tho cuz I'd like to get on with my own plans and things.
Who is gonna be President?
What's going to happen to the economy?
What new technology is going to BLOW UP?
What scandal will the 24 hour news system over-report on and force us to try our best to ignore?
Other stuff?
- China will be a drag on stock prices
- VR
- Those fuckin' right-wing militant/terrorist gun nut idiots in Burns. Something will have to give there, eventually.
- Capitalism will collapse
- Drones with guns
- Turns out the Illuminati actually do run everything and this presidential election is all a clever misdirection by Hagbard Celine to bring about enough chaotic energy to summon Our Lady Dischord and lead us all into a golden age where jokes become the new universal religion.
- The emerging splat ball market.